Half Mile

How to unlock Half Mile in Cheevos, scroll a cumulative 3,000,000 pixels while browsing. Worth 25 XP.

The story

Partner. You have scrolled half a mile.

Cache does not measure browsing the way other people measure browsing. He does not care about hours. He cares about distance. Pixels, stacked one on top of the other, add up to something physical if you let them, and Cache has always let them.

Three million pixels is the number on the ledger today. Cache converted it for you already: half a mile. Eight city blocks. The walk from one end of a small downtown to the other, except you did it sitting down, one scroll at a time, spread across more sessions than either of you can count.

He has a route marked on a map in the Stash. It is exactly half a mile long. He drew it just so he could point at it and say: this is what you did. Not metaphorically. Actually.

The turn, for Cache, is always the same one. He expected the number to feel abstract. Instead it feels like proof. You went somewhere. The Stash has the receipt.

The catalog entry

THREE MILLION PIXELS SCROLLED Acquired: Scrolled a cumulative total of 3,000,000 pixels. Condition: Halfway there. The mile is achievable. Rarity: Uncommon. Cache's Notes: Half a mile. Cache has a map in the Stash with a route marked on it. The route is half a mile long. He put it there to illustrate what this number means in physical terms. You have moved down the equivalent of eight city blocks, in pixels, across many sessions. Cache thinks this is worth marking. It is marked.

Spoiler: how to unlock it

This one adds up quietly across every session you browse, so there is no single trick, just consistent use.

  1. Keep Cheevos running while you browse normally.
  2. Scroll through long pages: articles, feeds, product listings, anything with real length.
  3. Let the lifetime pixel count climb past 3,000,000 across as many sessions as it takes.

Cheevos tracks the total distance scrolled across your browsing history, not just in one sitting. Every scroll event on every page adds pixels to a running lifetime total. This achievement fires the moment that cumulative total crosses three million pixels, which is why it can unlock in the middle of an ordinary session with no warning. It is the halfway marker on the way to a full mile.

Where it fits in the Stash

Half a mile is the midpoint marker on the road to Doomscroller II, the full mile Cache logs separately. Every pixel between here and there is already being counted. To meet the raccoon keeping score, read the story.